Saying “Yes” to the “Big Money”

I took a workshop on nonviolent communication once and as I was standing at the snack table a woman commented on how she couldn’t eat a specific food because she was allergic.  A second woman asked her if she wanted to get rid of the allergy and offered to do it.  The first woman didn’t say yes or no.

I don’t have any allergies, but I was intrigued why the woman wouldn’t jump at the chance to get rid of an allergy.  I imagined that she didn’t trust the other woman and/or didn’t believe that she could just get rid of an allergy standing there in the middle of a class.  I wondered about how the second woman could get rid of allergies, but I didn’t ask.  Later, when I began to study ThetaHealing, I suspected the woman might have been a ThetaHealer, because “pulling” allergies is easy to do and works most of the time.

Today I am thinking about how we say “no” to offers and why.

I am reminded of another story.  I heard this at a big speaker event for a 12 step fellowships.  A woman talked about how she used to pray to God for the addict boyfriend she wanted to keep.  Over and over she would ask for that relationship to work.  Now, she realizes that she was begging God to give her a penny when God had a $100 in his hand he was trying to offer her.  Her conclusion:  Often we only ask for a penny when we could have a $100.

When I first found out about enlightenment I was thrilled.  Someone had figured out how to end suffering, sickness, aging and death.  And it wasn’t just some unknown person, it was the Buddha.  Even I had heard of him.  And so it seemed credible to me.  As soon as I heard about it I was ready.  I signed up for it.  No hesitation.

Yet, other people are not instantly thrilled.  I am flabbergasted.  Why wouldn’t someone embrace this path immediately?  Well, perhaps, like that woman with the allergy, they simply don’t trust the teachings and/or they doubt it is even possible.  Or maybe they are going after something they think will bring them more satisfaction (the penny) instead of accepting what is unimaginable (the $100).

I know that twenty years ago, I couldn’t even imagine the level of contentment, competence, and peace I feel today.  Twenty years ago I was not grounded and centered.  Even the change in the past three years has been mind-boggling.  And still I am completely different from what “I” will be when enlightened.  Indeed, I cannot imagine and do not even care to speculate what that will be like.  I’ve talked about this before in the post on What’s Left After the Unveiling.  I am glad that I’ve chosen over and over again to not settle for the penny and to be open to saying yes to unlimited possibilities.



I have had so many ideas that I have wanted to write about in the past month.  Despite how much pleasure I derive from writing, I have chosen to do other things that are not quite as fun – mainly homework. My greatest challenge is my cultural awareness class where I was asked to explore and embrace my “identity” which is in complete opposition to my spiritual goal of exposing my identity as a flimsy construct.  I had a little bit of an internal revolt when faced with the assignment.  Thank goodness I was able to soften and complete the task.

Right now one of my goals is to complete all my classwork for February by the end of January.  This means four more full days of homework.  Why would I do this?  Well, I have another goal of spending more time in practice.  Which is just an extension of my goal to become enlightened and know peace.  My plan is to dedicate February to more intensive practice, but I have already tripled my formal practice in anticipation of this.  I encourage everyone to simply double the time they are meditating and practicing internal arts and see what that does for them.

Setting a goal and keeping a goal is simply a matter of keeping cognizant of what you want in your life.  When I reviewed what I wanted in my life and what my activities were, I made the following changes:

  1. Dropped a day at the spa – I now work only two days there and am considering dropping it completely
  2. Decided to finish my associates degree in substance use disorders – this was an intuitive yes, but I can also see how it contributes to my own growth and my potential to help others
  3. Committed to 200,000 mantras for the year – half focused on removing obstacles and the other on the six perfections  (I already have 38,000 completed)
  4. Dropped weekly group at my house that was not contributing to my goals
  5. Committed to a new food plan that allows me more freedom, keeps me feeling great, and helps keep me aware of my addictive cravings
  6. Began setting things up so that I could have additional retreat time
  7. Limited social contacts and meaningless chatter
  8. Nurtured my home based clientele by obtaining new training, expanding my services, and creating space for new clientele
  9. Dropped recreational activities like movie watching
  10. Limited home improvement projects


I have some people imply that I should have more fun.  Hey, just because I refuse a social activity does not mean that I do not say yes to an activity that nourishes me and is alignment with my practice.  I had other people comment that I was too rigid, especially in regards to my food.  If an alcoholic adamantly says “No” to beer or a diabetic adamantly says “No” to sugar is that being too rigid?  Perhaps it is, but it also seems very self-serving.

Remember toNourishment

Thoughtfully consider what it is you wish to nourish;  thoughtfully consider what will best nourish it.

To thine ownself be true.

(Hexagram symbol for nourishment from the I Ching.)

Tao Te Ching Verse 76

One of my all time favorite verses:

When born, humans are supple and yielding;

in death, they turn hard and rigid.

All things, when living, are soft and pliable;

and dead, dry and brittle.


Therefore to be stiff and unbending is the way of death,

and to be supple and yielding is the way of life.


An army that cannot yield will be defeated.

A tree that cannot bend will crack in the wind.


Thus by nature’s own decree:

the hard and stiff will be laid low,

and the soft and gentle will rise up.